FAQ for men

 

As I am married, how do I overcome my guilt when I seek sexual healing from you?
What can I gain from your session if my wife and I have a good and healthy sexual relationship?
Can I use everything I experience during the session in my relationship?
How do you teach tantric sex without using penetration and sexual positions?
Do you get pleasure yourself from your sessions?
Do you get aroused?
Do you reach orgasm during sessions?
Can I ejaculate several times during the session?
Will I ejaculate at the end of the session?
How can you help me to restore my sensuality?
How many sessions do I need?
What length of session do you recommend?
Can you show me where the G-spot in a woman’s body is?
How can you be loving to every man you meet?
Would you meet any man?
Where does your experience come from?
Why are you a little bit more expensive than other tantric teachers?

 

I am really excited about the tantric sexual healing you can offer, for example, treating it like a form of relaxation and meditation and providing prostate massage to tune my sexual arousal points. This may sound stupid to you but as I am married, how do I overcome my guilt when I seek sexual healing from you?

Tantra has no morality or immorality. We all have sexual energy in our bodies, which is a big part of our life energy. We need to cultivate and balance our sexual energy just as we need to eat and breathe. Sexuality is a health issue. But there is very little proper teaching available about healthy sexuality. The way sex is presented in our society often makes people feel ashamed to explore their sexuality in an open and mature way. A healthy sexual life is a very important factor for a loving relationship, personal growth and fulfilment. Guilt can also come from the desire to gain sexual arousal for the sake of pure pleasure. The man who emailed me this question talks about “tuning” his sexual arousal points…My sessions are not for satisfying your physical sexual desires. My sessions are to help you to discover all your loving and sensual potential, increase your life energy and to teach you techniques which can transform your sexual life with your partner or wife into a deep soul-body connection. 

 

What can I gain from your session if my wife and I have a good and healthy sexual relationship?

You might love dancing and think that you are not bad at it, but when you meet a real dancer, you see how much you need to learn. There is always room for improvement, of course, if you want to develop. And it is worth remembering that without constant development, a good sexual relationship can easily become routine. Meeting with me opens you to ways you can develop your relationship. If you have a wonderful relationship with your wife, why not to see me as a couple?

 

Can I use everything I experienced in a session in my relationship?

This what the session is for. Any serious mature woman, a mother of children, a woman who respects herself as a person, would not want to be treated or to behave like a sex object, an instrument of erotic amusement for her partner. Very often, a man thinks that his wife has complexes or she is cold and frigid by nature when she refuses sex and feels hurt when offered to try “sexy games”.  Pornography and the sex industry have a damaging role on men’s understanding of women’s sexuality. I have met husbands who were deeply in love with their wives, but still did not understand why sexy underwear as a birthday present was thrown down in disgust. I will teach you how to understand and lead your partner to deeper sensations and how to create a beautiful arousing touch. I will give you the whole spectrum of possibilities you can use for building up your unique sensual relationship as an expression of your love and care for your partner.

 

How do you teach tantric sex without using penetration and sexual positions?

Tantra is not about sexual positions at all! Tantra is a state of your consciousness and can be reached with or without intercourse. Tantra is about creating comfort and relaxation in the body. When lovers relax into sex and allow their bodies to melt into each other, the result is a free flowing exchange of energy which is very powerful – an endless ocean of pleasure and happiness. 

I understand the importance of using sexual positions that both partners are comfortable and happy with. In this respect, I teach sexual positions.

I am not against penetration during the session, but I have developed a special technique which creates a sense of penetration without actual penetration. This enables me to teach a man how to control his excitement. It is very effective for men, who suffer from premature ejaculation or who have problems with erections. The other reason for not using penetration during the session is that it is suitable for men who want to learn but who are concerned about remaining faithful to their partners. I teach how to be emotionally open and creative in lovemaking, how to become a master of sexual energy and how to develop the highest awareness and sensitivity to female emotional and physical needs. This does not necessarily require actual penetration with me.

 

Do you get pleasure yourself from your session?

My pleasure is very important to me but it is not a physical sexual pleasure. My pleasure is in providing teaching and therapy for you. I do this in an artistic way and the sensual erotic art which I present is my pleasure. My art is unique because of my personally, my knowledge, artistic vision and creative nature. I know that I am gifted with special abilities to sense you, to recognise your tension, worries, blockages and dissolve them by putting you into a magical world of music, movement and touch, which will make you feel romantic and happy. I use my sensuality as my sensor to help you and also as a source of energy which I exchange with you.

 

Do you get aroused?

I do get aroused but my arousal is consciously cultivated for the purpose of radiating energy towards you and sensing your energy. My arousal is also a sign for you that you are doing the right things.

 

Do your have an orgasm during the session?

The session is not for me, it is for you. I do not need physical satisfaction as such. I need a balance which I reach by being tantric – not aiming for orgasm. Also I do not have orgasm as it presented in society with all those noises and hustle. This is a waste of energy. Through relaxation I let my body experience a lot of orgasmic waves during the lovemaking, and some very strong ones, but they very rarely result in cumming. This what I wish for my client to learn during the session. Please read carefully my article “Orgasm” on my site www.newtantra.com.

Can I ejaculate several times?

In Tantra ejaculation is not the goal of making love (read my articles).  If you have never learned ejaculation control you might think it is good to have several ejaculations, one after another during sex. You might feel that if you ejaculate only once you are still unsatisfied and “hungry” for sex. But you should understand that when you ejaculate, you lose a lot of energy. When you are young it is easier to regain the energy soon after ejaculation, but as you get older, you will experience difficulties getting an erection for a much longer time after ejaculation. You may become a disappointment for your partner. You may create complexes in your subconscious which are very difficult to overcome. Believe me - having a poor erection is a very common problem nowadays for a lot of men who have not even reached 30! And this is mainly because of frequent ejaculation.
When you ejaculate, you lose energy which is vital for your whole body. You lose the sexual energy which your woman needs to feel loved and close to you. Imagine your body as a house with a fireplace (your genitalia). The fire is your sexual energy. When fire is burning it heats the house. We need to move the energy from the genitalia through all body channels. When your body becomes “heated” it will heat the “woman’s house”, the body of your partner, which needs much more time to heat than your body. If you ejaculate, your body becomes “cold”. If you think that you can get an erection again soon and that your partner will be happy to wait for this, you are making a big mistake. When a woman is left with her unsatisfied desire for love and happiness, she looses trust in you. Subconsciously, she feels betrayed. She feels the lack of your love and care for her. I teach you how to make love as long as you both want. Ejaculation is not part of this teaching - control of ejaculation is. Ejaculation is not a way to happiness - control of it is.  

 

Will I ejaculate in the end?

You probably will. However, ideally, you will be able to balance your sexual energy and release your sexual tension without ejaculation after one session with me. We can get to perfection only through practice. I cannot guarantee that you will learn such understanding at once. I will just point you in this direction. You can develop this ability within the relationship you have.  Experience with me will be important for you in terms of understanding control, cultivation circulation, channelling and exchange the sexual energy. Ejaculation, if it happens at the end of the session when I introduce you to high orgasmic waves, will not be my aim, nor should it be yours. If it happens it happens. If not, you will not feel that you missed out.

How you can help me to restore my sensuality?

Your partner is the mirror of you and visa versa. What is in your heart is in your touch. I will introduce you to emotions which can change your touch. If you become the mirror of my touch and sense my emotions through my touch to you it will become like transmission between us, a transmission of love and care through touch. Using your senses, I will raise loving and gentle feelings in your heart, cultivate them, awaken them. This will bring a crucial change to your understanding of sexuality. This change is subconscious. It is not possible to grasp logically, that’s why it is not possible to describe by words. It is like light which I will “turn on” in you. It is not possible to describe light or sound. You need to experience it.
The experience will become your light which you can take home to your partner. The experience will help you to change yourself. Changing yourself, you can change your relationship.

 

How many sessions do I need?

Only practice will provide the answer. I cannot say anything without meeting you and without touching you. People are different, have different abilities, different complexes and problems, different past experiences. I will try to read all of them from your body. I know body language well enough to be able to teach you this language too.

 

What length of the session do you recommend?

I do not recommend any length. If you read what my sessions are and what Tantra means for me, you can chose what you need, how long and how deep. I would only say that a 2 hour session gives me just enough time to lead you into an experience which can change your life.  A 1 hour session is only recommended to those who are searching for empowering energy work to relief stress and for young men suffering from premature ejaculation problems.

 

Can you show me where the G-spot in woman’s body is?

What can any little spot do for love? I believe – nothing. If you want to trigger physical excitement in your partner then you can look for the spot. But I do not believe that women in general are longing for you to know where the G-spot is. Personally, as a mature woman, I would never have a relationship with a man who searched for the G-spot in my body. I want to have a relationship with a man who treats me as a person, with deep respect and who will approach my body just with care, gentleness and awareness of my every reaction to his touch. The whole human body is a G-spot when your consciousness is filled with love.   

 

How can you be loving to every man you meet?

To be loving is a state of being. My state of being is love, my consciousness is filled with love. We all can be like that. By being loving to every man from the depth of my heart I give him a chance to express his own loving nature.

 

Would you meet any man?   

My work is healing and teaching. I would not meet a man who does not understand the principles of my work. I can recognise it via his e-mail or phone conversation. I love to hear from men who are searching for emotional depth and inner discovery; they may be nervous or shy, which is often a sign of innocence and a tactile nature. Sexuality is a way to express love. Love is within us. I would only meet a man who has a loving and gentle soul, who is not searching for thrills. I require a man to be attentive to what I say and concentrate on tranquillity, peace and beauty when thinking about sexuality.

Where does your experience come from?

My experience comes from real life, from my loving heart and creative vision.
I was not “trained” to become a “Tantra instructor” by any Indian or American guru or his “students”. I do not possess lists of certificates which you can find on many websites of “tantricas” or “goddesses”.  I don’t believe such training is possible. I do think that some books have helped me to learn a great deal, but my teaching is not borrowed from books or from other people’s ideas. I do not teach you from the point of view of someone who has had only one relationship with one man. I do not see how someone can teach many different people if they have only had one permanent partner for 20 years. What they are advising may only be suitable for their partner. 

I have been practising Tantra directly throughout my life, and for many years as a Tantric therapist for men. Without actual physical experience, it is difficult to understand the difference between ordinary sex and tantric sex.  Close physical contact, which I provide in my sessions, is the only way to truly experience Tantra. It was the only way I came to understand a lot about human sexuality. I have helped and have taught a lot of men as well as helped myself to stay healthy and young looking.

Please do not be offended, but why are you a little bit more expensive than other Tantric teachers?

If you read my websites carefully (www.tantralondon.co.uk and www.newtantra.com) and do not see that I have nothing to do with mainstream “tanricas”, it means that I am probably not the right choice for you. I feel that I deserve what I charge. People who have met me say that I am unique... that what I offer is unique.