The Role of Woman (as I see it)

A long time ago society changed from matriarchy to patriarchy and woman lost her essential nature and abilities. As a result, both men and women suffer today from misunderstanding their nature and roles. We are lost in wrong ideas about our sexuality. Woman has to return to her true nature, she has to make an effort to open her natural potential, while man has to surrender responsibilities that are not his. Then we will find happiness again.

The role of woman in matriarchal society

Where does Tantra come from? From India? From Tibet? From China and Japan? Some books say it comes from Thailand…
They are all right because they’re many different Tantric schools. But all of them came after.
After what? After the civilisation of matriarchal society was forgotten.
Tantra originates from the pre-patriarchal era, when women were leaders of society; they maintained peace and comfort for children and for their men. Men were not so much warriors, but hunters and gatherers. When they returned to their tribes physically tired women knew how to look after their men’s bodies and energy to make them ready for the next day to run long distances again. The nature of sexual practice was healing and recharging and so was divine and shameless.

The role of woman in patriarchal society

Tantra that we know as Indian, Chinese or other was born within the male-oriented society, where role of the woman was diminished and her sexuality was repressed and turned to man’s entertainment. A woman had to develop more and more skills to please the man rather then heal him. So many different rituals and elements of unnatural games were invented. And it is still the same today. Man wants entertainment even if he says that he wants to please a woman. The shape of her body, her soft flesh excites him. He wants actions and the visual pleasure of sexy pictures. Sometimes women happy to follow man’s shallow games but very often they are left unfulfilled sexually, feeling used. Male-orientated society has turned women in sexual dolls. Though modern woman has learned how to get pure physical pleasure for her body and how to use her sexuality as a tool for survival.

What has woman lost?

Woman has lost her natural beauty, softness and feminism, she has lost her inner harmony, peace, happiness and comfort because she has lost the ability to sense a man’s body and to lead him through lovemaking, saving his energy and empowering it using the energy of her own body and soul. She often has a man who climax before she reaches her orgasm. She does not know any more that orgasm is not important for her. She becomes obsessed with the orgasm because it is a man, who made her believe that she needs it and who constantly tries to make her come. He likes the sound of woman’s crying, he wants to feel “great”, the hero who has satisfied the woman. It is again one of the games that give him confidence in his power. He is again conquering.
A woman lost understanding of her real desire: desire to unite with the man, to hold him within her body and nourish this connection as the connection of hearts, just bringing power to the man’s body to sustain his and her erection. Woman does not need orgasm as a man does. Her body is designed to hold and feed, as the Earth holds seeds. Woman is a place for a man to rest and to find love. Orgasm is often reached by a great hustle that leaves the body tired and soul empty. A myth about the female orgasm and especially about female ejaculation (using the dildo!) brings a great deal of money from publishing thousands of books on how to satisfy a woman and from selling all those vibrators. You can find on Internet advertising of ridiculous matter: “Break through to female orgasm” offering magnetic sound track that is supposed to influence a woman’s brain increasing sexual desire. Half an hour in headphones before 5 minutes of sex! Would it mean love? This is what a woman really wants: orgasm in 5 minutes?
Now more and more women do not need a man any more except for money and children. They hide their despair for love, loneliness and depression the same way as men do.

What has man lost?

Man has lost his peace, happiness and comfort because he constantly thinks about sex, because he constantly worries about his erection and because he most of the time ejaculates sooner than his woman will reach her orgasm: the only satisfaction he can give to her while making love …
But, he has lost much more than that; he has lost woman’s LOVE. He has lost it forever! Having sex a man never can find there this authentic, decent love of a woman, when she feels like a Mother: like Mother-Earth, like Mother-Sun, like Mother-Energy for him. He feels used too, in return.

How can a woman deal with man’s desire for sex?

A woman should relearn how to feel man’s body. She needs to treat a man’s body as she treats the child’s body when the child is ill or tired: she knows that her mother’s cuddle or strokes, or just a long embrace would help. This way she can make her man surrender to her, to her care, let him to absorb her loving energy and relax into it like into warm water. Women should not try to escape sex, like they often do, but turn it into a meditative connection between two bodies by taking the lead.

How important is orgasm for a woman?

Personal experience has shown me that when I forced myself into orgasm I felt tired for a long time afterwards, and even more – depressed though being in deep love with my partner. Many women not only of mature age, but even very young ones, would admit that they do not like to have sex with their partners because next day they feel tired. I have also discovered something else: when I do not make love to my partner for two or three days I feel lack of energy too. I need loving contact with my man, to give him my love and make my body vibrate in arousal without orgasm and then I feel energetic and happy again. My photos on this website are real. I put them there not only for men but also for women to see. I do not hide my age, 49, I look much younger, as people say, because of my tantric approach to life. A woman needs love and arousal for her beauty and health. But, she should stop looking for orgasm, for pure sexual physical pleasure, even if most of modern tantrikas or sex-advisers would make her strive for orgasm. I believe that women in Taoist societies were more involved in healing and spiritual aspects (having a sense if a union) of lovemaking rather then on the recreational. If women today could realise that, they would gain more happiness from GIVING in lovemaking. Then everything would naturally fall into place, women would achieve the greatest pleasure ever experienced.

I think that developing lumps and other illnesses in breasts and genitalia as well as men’s prostate problems, are connected to repression of sexual energy or the wrong sexual practice via loosing the energy through mainstream “pick” type of orgasm.


What are the benefits for a woman of being the leader during lovemaking?

Her man would adore her! She would feel appreciated. She would experience a wonderful kind of influence over her man, which gives her confidence and security of marriage. She would feel mature, wise and generous, proud of her spiritual beauty. What more could she want to give? What could be more fulfilling and important to her: her man’s heart is always hers. She would have a man, who is relaxed and grateful to her, because she would always reduce his stress, tension and frustration by her loving sensual touch. What a wonderful environment for her children!

What woman should do?

Se should stop seeing her man as her “sexual daddy” as society suggests, she should stop waiting for his actions to satisfy her sexually (often blaming him for failure).
She needs to return her natural knowledge of motherhood of everything and everyone. Without this she will never be truly happy, never fulfilled, never loving. Her sexual life would be always prostitution-like: exchange of her body for something else (orgasm, money, security). Which combination is more natural, strong and harmonised? The trunk under the hot sun winding around the vine or the vine winding around the trunk? It is clear that in the first case both would hardly survive, the trunk would crush the vine and very soon become a withered piece of wood. The second instance would create an unbreakable union: the vine would save the trunk’s moisture from the sun by covering it in cool leafs. A woman’s body is soft, flexible and cool, where man’s is awkward, bulky and hot. In sexual union woman’s role is to surround the man by herself: physically and psychologically.

Woman and only woman can bring to the world beauty, love and peace. Her mother-like sexuality can calm man’s desire to conquer her body. She can turn his restlessness for achievements into kindness and peacefulness. It can change our man-oriented world for the better. It will bring INNOCENCE to the world of adults: we all need it and we all lost it.